How about we not waste my time writing a synopsis of this film. I’ll grab the one issued by Universal Studios and then we’ll get on with the review:
Dr. Alan Grant (Sam Neill) was personally shaken by his encounter with live dinosaurs, but remains determined to study them. Desperate to fund research for a new theory about Velociraptor intelligence, he’s particularly vulnerable when the wealthy Kirby’s approach him, offering money for his presence on an aerial tour of Isla Sorna, adjacent to Isla Nublar, the site of Grant’s nightmarish experiences. Once fate causes them to crash on the island, he learns that it was a scam concocted by the Kirby’s to get an experienced guide to help them find and rescue their son, who vanished while vacationing…not realizing that Grant’s prior visit was NOT to Isla Sorna. Marooned in a savage land, they have to struggle to escape from all sorts of new creatures with their lives.
Glad we got that nonsense out of the way. Right from go, I’m wondering what I would do. That would be a good question if I could even imagine being stupid enough to find myself where this handful of morons do. Then there are scenes where you wonder out loud what in the hell makes them think they’d be safer in there. I mean, do they really think running away is going to help? It’s just garbage. I wonder if this is why Steven Spielberg stayed away from this project.
Even three Hollywood writers couldn’t come up with a script worth watching. All of the thrills of the dinosaurs and a few moments of tension couldn’t save this mess. The caper is the Pterodactyls soaring free as a bird at the end. Believe me, this has no significance to the plot or the film, but it shows just how asinine this film is: these dinosaurs are supposed to pose some threat to humans around the world, yet they’re just allowed to fly free. Give me a break! What a weak way to save your ass for a sequel. They should do us all a favor and let it end here.
+ charlie craine
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