“It’s amazing what you can do when you don’t have to look at yourself in the mirror anymore.” That’s the quote of all quotes from this summer’s special effects extravaganza, Hollow Man, perfectly spoken by Kevin Bacon as Sebastian Caine. Even though he parades through half of the movie invisible, I’m amazed he still had the balls to be a part of such blatant crap.
Speaking of balls, haven’t we seen enough of Kevin Bacon’s? Once again, he struts across the big screen showing off glimpses of his manhood, this time as Sebastian Caine, an egocentric genius working on a serum that induces invisibility. Before revealing to the Pentagon the results, he convinces his team of scientists to test the serum out on himself. What ensues is a string of violent acts that are so out of place and ridiculous, you’ll find yourself laughing, if not moaning, at the stupidity.
Already plagued by an out-of-control God complex, once under the serum, Caine becomes a modern-day monster. With visual triumph, the Hollow Man’s presence is eerie, and while there are times when the raspy whisper of Bacon’s voice puts the right amount of chill in the moment, all of the technical gadgets in the world can’t compensate for the unforgivable script and bad acting.
I shouldn’t push all of the blame on Bacon. After all, it’s Elizabeth Shue who is honored, or shall I say branded, with top billing. Playing the role of Linda McKay, Shue is bland and phony, her line delivery nothing short of stoic. And what’s up with those seductive moves? She is hardly the sex symbol type. Her relationship with fellow scientist, Matt (Josh Brolin), is meant to be a secretive affair, but once ex-lover Caine finds out, fuel is only added to the fire. This love-triangle sub-plot is so underdeveloped and distracting, I shouldn’t even waste my time talking about it, yet it’s one of the reasons Hollow Man is as bad as it is. If they wanted to explore character relationships, they should’ve thought about actual character development first.
Though Hollow Man does have some noteworthy effects, I can’t justify any reason for shelling out the cash to see it. Just look at the definition of hollow before you waste your time: (halo) adj. empty or worthless; not real or meaningful. Finally a movie that lives up to its title. What’s more, this movie should just plain disappear.
+ ashley adams